Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry

2009-03-23T00:18:00.000+08:00

i have moved.

mylaststeps.wordpress.com

2009-02-08T23:23:00.001+08:00

If I were blue, would you be there for me,
And whisper in my ears that's ok.
Would you stand by me, let me hold you tight,
And say you love me one more time.

If I feel good, would you slow dance with me,
And touch my lips with tender loving care,
Would you die for me, would you run with me,
And never look back..
Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there..

If i'm away, would you still think of me,
And wish that you could hold me now,
Would you die for me, would you run with me,
All the way..

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight,
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you will always be there,
To kiss my pain away...

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight,
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you will always be there,
To kiss my pain away...

Would you be there? for me...

2009-01-21T23:54:00.001+08:00

in the same night, u turned my sorrows into joy. And made me look at the bright side of things. I will cry, but these tears will be the marks of a fighter, and that i will pick myself up the next time i fall. Thankyou.

2009-01-21T21:40:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, life really isn't fair to you.

After getting back the results of my repapers, i've realised i'm seriously in deep shit. what i thought was easy turned out to be an S grade. No matter how much effot i put in, the result is just still the same - a pathetic S grade. If this continues, my motivation will sink faster than the titanic. I really want to see some results soon, and a whole lot of encouragement.

It's been like this every night for the past few days. Actually, it's been the same for the past few months. I don't know what you're thinking but it's making me feel emotionally unstable. I need a sign.

Sometimes, every cloud has a silver lining.

If i were a rich guy

2009-01-06T23:01:00.002+08:00

I would stop owing people money. I would be able to buy my new contact lense, memory card for my phone, curtains, new pillows, star earrings, duplicate my house keys and the ___keys, and buy the lime green quilt cover i saw in ikea that i absolutely love. but that is if i had the money. Then i won't have to keep asking my dad for money.

anyway, i totally missed the little nyonya craze. so i'm watching it all online now. haha so late, i know. but it's really very exciting like they said. I'm still on the 5th episode. But the plot is really good. Ok back to studying econs.

2009-01-01T22:37:00.002+08:00

2008 went by too fast. If i could turn back the clock for just a moment, i'd know which part i want to turn back to.

Although 2008 went by just like that, many many interesting and unforgettable stuff happened.

joined vj choir, which i'll never regret.
cried because i hated choir at one point.
cried again because i realised it's the people inside the choir that i love.
became part of 08A13 which rocks because of a few people.
experienced and hated PW.
i finally found the motivation to go to the gym.
went from 0 pull ups in june to 13 pullups now.
almost failed my promos (SSSD).
went to wales, grew alot there.
had the worst family quarrel in my life.
found a brother.
found someone to believe in.

but i'm glad that when that's all over, the best friends are still here with you. i'm glad i spent the new year with bestfriends that will stick with you for life.

Resolutions for 09?
go to the gym regularly
watch what i eat and enjoy it
save enough money to buy my wants
study study study
improve in my grades until 2009
get a silver for napfa
bond with my class more
celebrate all my friends' birthdays
hang out with choir people at the same time
balance sing, study and friends.

Christmas

2008-12-26T00:50:00.003+08:00

This year's christmas seems to be lacking something. Or maybe too much of something else. Anyway, the best present i received was from my santa. A pair of really shiny earrings =) But other than that, caroling didn't seem as much fun as last year haha, but none the less, i still had fun =)

Time to get serious with my school work and gym routine now. 3 R papers and the perfect hotbod here i come! Consistency is the key. Gym once in every 2 days, starting from tomorrow! Study at least 5 hours a day starting from tomorrow too!

Pictures of caroling will be up soon =)

2008-12-21T10:29:00.003+08:00

4 more days to Christmas. And i haven't bought all my presents yet! It sucks when you've run out of cash, esp on christmas. Argh i'll have to eat into my allowance yet again. I need to start writing cards!!

So little time left. R-papers!! No time to study for that. Argh i seriously need to touch on history and econs. 3 freaking Rpapers. Wtf. Ok i should stop complaining and just start doing my work. Maybe after caroling i should go back to my usual haunts during the Olevel period.

I'm quite satisfied with my new k850i! I think i'm gonna last quite a long time with it =) the next thing i need to buy is curtains. It sucks when every morning you are woken up by the bright sunlight. Or at night when your neighbour is peeking into your room. wtf, no privacy at all. Yep, maybe when i've saved abit i'll head down to ikea.

I'm starting to miss caroling already. i can't imagine myself surviving next year. With prelims and Alevels and SOV and SYF and Austria. It would take a whole lot of determination and perseverence man. I guess this is the breath before the deep plunge. My last hooray until 2010. Caroling this year seems to be much more intensive compared to last year. Yesterday was almost my peak. Which sucks cuz i was so tired yesterday and not focused at all.

Ok i better head to the gym now.

2008-12-14T22:30:00.002+08:00

Went for serene's wedding today! Some dishes were nice, some were awful(like the noodles), but it was a wonderful experience. Seeing her get married makes me feel old. We sang for her too, i hope she liked it even though we were not very good =P But i think the best part of the wedding was during serene's speech. It was seriously very touching to see her showing her gratitude to everyone. Seriously makes all the failed practices worth while.

Ok i really need to start on my econs and math and history, and although i don't have lit Rpaper, i really need to brush up on my vocab. I sound like a secondary school student. Crap. I want to use words like hoyden, caustic, scabrous, cardinal and burreptitious (ok, i made the last one up). Anyway, the point i'm trying to make is that i'm lacking in my studies.

Let's play SantaBaby!

CRC♥ JTS 2008!

2008-12-10T18:07:00.002+08:00

CRC♥ JTS 2008 was hilarious hahahaha! Too bad i had to leave early! The rest of the photos are up on facebook, and so is the super hilarious video!

Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me

2008-11-15T23:04:00.003+08:00

I've missed out on ALOT of birthdays this year. Kinda regret it. Sigh, next year i promise i'll not take my friends for granted and treat them better. That will be my 09 new year resolution.

Yesterday's carolling really sucked for me. I choose to believe that i was at fault then and didn't memorise my scores well enough. Thank god we didnt do mummy or gaudete. I'd die. But on a brighter note, i got 50 bucks from the 1 hour singing at CKtangs! Oh well, it's gone now haha.

The DSA people came today. It's kinda nostalgic seeing DSA year0s then later the appeals. Sigh, it made me think of how i was a DSA kid last year, feeling so blur and fish-out-of-water. Thinking back, i realised being a year 0 was one of the best moments that i can never get back. That period went by too fast. Too fast. I miss being a year 0. Anyway, glad that the year 0s could come sing with us today. Today's leonardo was quite nice, compared to previous weeks. Maybe it was the instruments, or maybe it was the extra effort to make dynamics stand out more. But i really felt the excitement when leonardo finally flew. awesome. Matesaule was awesome too singing RANDOMLY and building up at the last part.

Ikea'ed with bits just now, that was where i burnt all of my 50bucks. Bought candles and a mirror and another fbt to add to my collection. I don't really regret it since it was quite a worthy buy.

2008-10-29T21:20:00.002+08:00

Hmm, my second post of the day.

I just realised i'm in a middle of a bitch war, and i might justb e the next victim. Better keep a low profile for now =] For now, i feel like singing, singing till my heart's content. I want to sing hana, and the akustica songs, and eric whitacre songs, and i want to learn the magic songs. But the sucky part is the memorising. I seriously hate that. hatehatehatehatehate. I'm lucky enough to learn some of the songs last year. but i can't wait for carolling. like seriously, i need that now, other than money of course.

I need to stop going out. I saw this awesome rayban sunglasses. i'll try to take a pic soon and post it up here. it's going at an awesome price of 258 too! Sigh, and i still have yet to buy my side table(40) and mirror(10). i'm planning to use my next fornight's allowance to subscribe to arena(90). Sigh so many things to buy, so little money.

Identity Crisis

2008-10-29T20:39:00.004+08:00

R said that i have an identity crisis.

This got me pondering for a few days, and i realised that she was telling me the truth i didn't want to hear. I thought to myself and realised that i've been living my life through someone else's shoes. It's like i always try to be someone i'm not, and emulating that person's actions and thoughts. Of course, these actions and thoughts are what i perceive that person would say or do. To put it simply, i'm trying to be someone else by doing things i think that person would do. And it's not always the same person. Like when i'm writing an essay, i try to be like Kenny, when i want to save money, i try to be like bitsy and imitate his saving money tactics. when i sing, i try to sound like desmond or steven. when i'm gymming, i take on another persona and the same goes for my room. I'm trying to make my room seem like another person's room. I don't have my own set of ideas, or rather my ideas are mostly derived from someone i'm trying to be. And i think it has gotten quite bad.
i think this has also indirectly caused me to become so weight conscious too. I'm really want to be myself, but i don't remember what 'myself' used to be anymore.

I really hate the word pathetic because it downgrades and humiliates the person being called pathetic but i really have to use that word on myself now.

Finally a long post.

2008-10-27T00:44:00.002+08:00

I realised i've not been blogging consistently, and most of the time, they are rather short posts. So since i have the time to spare (actually i should be studying for chinese alevels), i shall rant.

The weekend was nice. I guess after one whole week of chinese, i'm really really glad the weekend came. I feel quite rejuvenated now. Prac was quite nice on saturday, although i hate the 4 people thing. Whose idea was it anyway? Anyway, i screwed up again on 'gaudete' and 'do you hear'. 'Do you hear' was bad enough, and to top it off, i had to sing the wrong notes in 'gaudete'. seriously, i've been given enough chances already and i still cannot get it. I've really tried, maybe someone else should do it. But marcuslee from chorale came up to me and said my voice was not bad. Sigh, i hope it wasn't to make me feel better. I really wanna do the solo well. i really do.

After choir, no one was free. So i had to go to parkway to wait for 3 hours until kenny was done. I felt like buying more things when i went to parkway. Went to check out the free weights, it was $100+..i really should start saving up for those. And i saw a few more fbts on sale in giant. I went to check out the acoustic guitars in yamaha too. quite nice and pricey.

Bryan was sick, really sick. so we cancelled our ikea outing and went to bryan's house instead. The journey there was quite annoying and it pissed me off. But it's okay cuz we got to laugh at your highness on the way there. Anw, we ordered pizza in the end and went home after that. Our ikea outings always end up in bitsy moments...lol

Sunday was better. I went to the gym in the morning =] and then to bryan's in the afternoon. I finally managed to play dota after such a long time. Although we lost a few matches, it was quite fun. Bryan had to go off and eat expensive meals so i went home..i went to cut my hair on the way back and the uncle there was nice and friendly, waxed my hair for free too. After that i went to chat with my optician. haha haven't had such a long chat with her before. I saw a pair of sunglasses which was really nice to the max too. The price is also to the max too..but i think i shall save for it. it costs 258, so probably by next year chinese new year i can get it =] i think i shall forgo the 142 adidas jacket since it's not really practical. but i will still but an adidas jacket..but a cheaper one, maybe $100? yea, i guess i really should be saving up this holiday. Xianhui offered me a job but i'd have to do it alone and the pay's not really good. If i had company then it'd be a different story..so i guess in the mean time, i shall ask my parents for money.

Oh wait, i forgot, there's a recession going on. $%^&!!

A random person.

2008-10-20T22:00:00.003+08:00

On my way back from school today, i just suddenly thought of an unexpected person. Someone whom i haven't talked to in a while. Anw, i met her just last saturday and it was damn funny to talk to her, even though it's just a few sentences. haha but i miss talking to shuwei. seems so long ago that i last talked to her. haha whenever i think of her i'll think of bits and the incident. Cracks me up all the time haha

yeap this is the photo which made me think of her during the bus ride home. i just happened to see that photo as i was randomly browsing through my ipod photos.

2008-10-19T13:46:00.002+08:00

Work is piling up for the holidays;

I&R
OP
Chinese Alevels
2 or 3 math papers
revise econs
revise history
Lots of GP worksheets

Anw, morning went out to swim. Got a tan and swam a few laps. Woots, i think i'm starting to like swimming even more.

afternoon, did my I&R abit and did my chinese compres. Emphasis on the 's' in 'compres'. So i did more than 1 compre. Maybe 2 i think. But the bulk of my afternoon was watching heroes!! I need to refresh my memory so i've been watching heroes season 1 and 2. Watched season 3 today. Totally awesome. There's so many powers i wished i had. The power to talk to machines, telekenesis, mind reading, superspeed, control fire, invisibility, prophetic vision, turn things into solid gold, electricity manipulation, healing. The list goes on. Imagine what i could do with those powers! I would finally be able to buy my new slippers and a new shoebag! haha =]

Happy Birthday Renee!

2008-10-17T20:11:00.002+08:00

I'm not really good with presents and cards so yea..But I really appreciate you since the start of this year. Even though i can't be there all the time cuz i pon so much, just know that i'm there with you mentally, if not physically, if u ever need a listening ear. Thanks for being my bestfriend ;]

In My Mind

2008-10-15T21:01:00.002+08:00

awesome song by melodie and cherissa. I'm addicted to it, and so it pocks. Oh and i need to buy a new shoebag and a pair of num slippers cuz someone stole mine. I'm such a sucker with money.

Recession

2008-10-13T22:07:00.003+08:00

i hate recessions. That means lesser spending power. just when i'm on a roll here. i still have a few more stuff to buy. sigh.

1) Mirror (Ram from Ikea)[9.90]
2) limegreen gym gloves, the one i saw at cathay adidas with pocks [29.90]
3) Adidas jacket at J8 i saw that time with edna about 1 or 2 months ago [142]
4) Cushion covers [19]
5) Side table [29]
6) cologne i saw at cathay with jialing!! [75 or 95]
7) Black choker [13]
8) Full FBT set [13.50 ea]
9) Free weights
10)New itouch silicon cover
11)Mouse

sigh, i guess these are in order of priority..I must work during the holidays..and continue GYMMING and SWIMMING!!! and studying i guess =.=

$

2008-10-01T19:15:00.002+08:00

I just realised without money, one cannot do anything much.

Yesterday was fun day! ice skating and raiders plus choir. Sigh but i kept borrowing money from friends i hope it doesn't become a habit. Yea, i felt like really hopeless and lost and like i couldn't do anything without money. I seriously like money i swear. Whoever said money can't buy happiness is really living in a desolute world. Money can indeed bring you happiness. Although it can't buy love though. But who needs love when u can have material wealth. It can last you thoughout a whole entire lifetime. The happiness i get derived from buying new furniture and clothing is so elating. With money, i don't have to work and that means not having to study. Oh man, i wish that was the case. I wanna strike the lottery someday, or find some rare artifact or maybe find a pink diamond on the street. I wish i had that kind of luck. Then, at least i can satisfy my short term wants. Who cares about long term when i can enjoy now. I need a holiday badly.

In the midst of it all

2008-09-23T23:00:00.003+08:00

It's almost hilarious how i don't give a heck how i did for my exams. All the work that i have put in since primary school..No, all the work i have been FORCED to put in. And until now, i still don't see the point. Why must we goddamn study so hard and do the things that we dispise so much? Why must i succumb to what others say and be influenced by them? why can't i make my own desicions? I never wanted to be where i am now. If not for my friends, i would probably have commited suicide by now. I tried asking God,, but i believed he abandoned me, or rather i abandoned him. Why must we live under the expectatiosn of others? Fuck. I'd rather do nothing and be happy than do something i know i don't love. I seriously don't feel the pressure of promos or school or studying. At this point, i don't care if i fail any subjects or have a billion R-papers or if i even drop out of this dumb school. I just feel like breaking this glass ceiling and start earning my own keep. Fuck.

Standing on the rooftop tell everybody scream your heart out.

2008-09-22T20:51:00.002+08:00

I want to be a more elastic consumer i.e. i want to have the ability to spend i.e. I want more money!! I love econs =.=

2008-09-16T22:12:00.001+08:00

Why isn't anyone blogging?

I hate studying. Period.

2008-09-14T22:54:00.003+08:00

Seriously, get your fucking head in the game. Next week's your promos, and here i am procrastinating shit. Fuck there's not enough time, and it's because i have lousy time management. Bullshit. This is all bullshit. I HATE STUDYING I HATE STUDYING I HATE STUDYING. Someone kill me so i don't have to do it myself. I just want to have a study-free life. Is that all too much to ask? Study so much for what? Just to get that fucking A level cert, then what? Go to uni and STUDY again la. Fuck, if this is the life i'm gonna lead, then i'd rather die. or become a beggar. whatever. Seriously, i just don't see the point in working so hard anymore. In the end, i'm proving nothing. I'm not accomplishing any shit here by studying. I don't know how many times i've said this but i'm gonna say it again. I wish i had all the money in the world. Quote me. If i had all the money in the world i don't have to study anymore, (insert ramblings)... All work and no play makes philip wanna kill himself. Shit i hate my life. I just wanna drop out of this place i call "school" and start working or something. Afterall, vj is soo deciving. i seriously don't know why i came to this school. Fuck i don't know what i'm going to next year with Alevels and lots of choir. Don't be surprised if i commit suicide sometime next year.

Oh by the way, i stopped beliving anymore. I just realised that every sunday morning since the beginning of my life has been a big fat lie.

I'd rather do nothing and be happy than do something that I don't like.

2008-09-11T23:17:00.002+08:00

Should i gym at the club tmr? or should i go to thompson to study? or should i go home straight after school for a "well deserved" rest? or should i stay in school to study? Or should i go to the airport and study and head on to bitsy's after that? I dunno, can someone tell me what to do tomorrow?

08A13

2008-09-08T20:17:00.003+08:00

This is home
Now I'm finally
Where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home
I've been searching
For a place of my own
Now I've found it
Maybe this is home
Yeah, this is home

Kill myself

2008-08-27T20:37:00.000+08:00

I should be studying.

2008-08-24T14:15:00.002+08:00

These few days of muted sunlight has been bliss =]

It feels great to be warm and snug up in my thick jacket. Spent yesterday doing basically nothing except staying in bed the whole afternoon. The cool rain air was fantastic too. I think i'm going to do that once i'm done with pw. Then probably head down to the gym again this evening. I wish i can do this everyday, and be home schooled or something. this way, i don't have to drag myself out of bed so early in the weekdays. Singapore education system rocks. Lucky VJ has so much emphasis on public holidays and festivities. That way, there's more excuse not to go to school. This friday's teachers' day. I think it's gonna be fun, Cuz i'll be spending the time at home =]] I hope it rains on that day too. Then i'll be freaking over the moon =]] Gym on a cold rainy morning is awesome too.

Renee says i have some issues. Ya, i think so too. I seriously need to get my head together. What the hell am i doing in school? What am i doing in church. All these seem to be a waste of time. I could be spending the time doing other stuff like gymming or earning money. Sigh, me and my screwed up thinking. I guess i'm kinda growing up..i hope. I keep having ideas of moving out and getting a place of my own once i start earning and having a stable income. It's so near yet so far away. I wanna earn money to buy all the stuff that's been on my shopping list for a long time. New handphone..new bag..Contact lenses.. a new makeover for my room.. Sigh, if only i had all the money in the world.

My freedom, my money and my mummy

The Cabinet

2008-08-21T21:02:00.000+08:00

School would be hell without you guys =]

What lips my lips have kissed

2008-08-21T20:42:00.002+08:00

I seriously don't feel like studying anymore. Like, what's the point? After promos, there's As, after As there's Uni. It's never fucking going to end. Why not just start working now? Sigh, maybe coming here wasn't really such a good idea.

What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why,
I have forgotten, and what arms have lain
Under my head till morning; but the rain
Is full of ghosts tonight, that tap and sigh
Upon the glass and listen for reply;
And in my heart there stirs a quiet pain
For unremembered lads that not again
Will turn to me at midnight with a cry.
Thus in the winter stands a lonely tree,
Nor knows what birds have vanished one by one,
Yet know its boughs more silent than before:
I cannot say what loves have come and gone;
I only know that summer sang in me
A little while, that in me sings no more.
- Edna St. Vincent Millay

i will miss you till my mind goes crazy

2008-07-30T22:57:00.002+08:00

And in this crazy life
And through these crazy times
Its you, its you
You make me sing
You're every line
You're ever word
You're everything
You're every song
And I sing along
'Cause you're my everything

LifeSucks

2008-07-27T00:25:00.003+08:00

PW.Math.GP.Econs.History.Lit.Napfa.Eom.Homework.Integration. Differentiation.Marketstructure.Addiction.Computer.ChineseCompos. SuckyResults.Suspension.Choir.'Friends'.OB.Relationships. Peerpressure.OverexcessiveWeightControl.Homework.

Ya life sucks.

Getting my priorities right

2008-07-24T21:36:00.002+08:00

I think something's fucking wrong with me. I just can't get my priorities right. I'm already in so much shit right now nad yet i'm still not trying to study. What the hell, i'm still slacking off and playing computer games. What is wrong with me seriously?! My brain seriously needs some rewiring. I'm not in secondary school anymore. I'm not here in vj for a holiday or the prestige. I'm here to work my ass off and achieve good grades so that i can get into a university and continue working my ass off. Right now, i'm just running away from all my problems and focusing on what is not important. I seriously have to stop playing and start working. I guess the only time i work is during school hours? And i'm wayy behind in econs and history. I seriously don't know how to pick myself up and strive on. Sigh, why can't i be like renee the superwoman? I seriously envy you because you can finish all your work on time and still have time to revise and gym everyday and have some personal time to yourself. I envy you because you can survive on not playing the computer. I just seriously envy you.

Choir people, if you're reading this, please help me get out of this state so i can continue singing with you.

Oh and my senses tell me something big is gonna happen soon, and it's not good.

2008-07-22T23:10:00.003+08:00

Will you be there on the other side waiting for me?

2008-07-20T01:33:00.002+08:00

When A takes the pill from B, A feels guilty and forgets about B after that. But when A takes the pill from C, A doesn't feel guilty after that and still has feelings for C. Does it mean A has a crush on C?

2008-07-18T00:46:00.002+08:00

Need a whole lot of motivation to gym and start studying again.. My homework's in a mess and i barely spend 1hr in the gym today. Sigh.. Sad, sad.

Glimpse of heaven

2008-07-15T22:39:00.002+08:00

When you look me in the eyes
I catch a glimpse of heaven
I find my paradise
When you look me in the eyes

When you look me in the eyes
And tell me that you love me
Everything's alright
When you're right here by my side

To friends that last.

2008-07-06T15:01:00.002+08:00

2008-07-01T23:36:00.003+08:00

I hate the bus ride home from school everyday. Especially when the bus is exceptionally crowded and packed like sardines and on top of that being caught in a jam. Take today for instance, I had to pick a seat that was so squeezy and i had to squeeze my size 1245874934 ass into that puny minute seat. I was so pissed by the time the bus passed potong pasir because i swear i had blisters on my butt or something along that line. To make matters worse, i was so tired i kept nodding my head on the glass window. In the end i gave up and just rested my head against the wax stained window. And when it got close to braddell, there was a *toot* jam and i was so pissed. The songs on my ipod sucks also so i got more and more miserable listening to my ipod. It was one of the most frustrating bus rides in my life and i never want to go through that awful experience ever. The bus ride was 1.5 hours by the way.

Bloody @#$%^&* bus!

Youru

2008-06-28T18:03:00.003+08:00

History essay

2008-06-23T19:26:00.002+08:00

Today, i had my first taste of hardcore history essay writing. 4 essays in 3 hours, that's 45 mins for each essay, that's 15 mins for each paragraph. The first essay i already felt like sleeping. On the second one, i had to wait 5 mins to rest before i started writing again. The third essay, i was thinking about random stuff like how wales is gonna be like and what i'm gonna eat for dinner and about you. And on the fourth essay, my hands hurt so bad that i cut down my essay to half the length. So that's how i survived my first 4-way history essay attack. One paper down, another 5 to go. Everyone said it was so damn hard, hope there aren't any closet muggers out there =[

2008-06-22T22:03:00.001+08:00

Study study study. Damn sian.
How am I supposed to breathe with no air.

Always be my baby

2008-06-21T23:58:00.003+08:00

Midyears. You're shitting me. I don't think i'm gonna pass it at all, least giving it a try. Fuck, i really hope i don't do too badly. afterall, it's only midyears. right?

I only hope that the journey doesn't end here.
When the sun sets, it will rise again.
Please don't leave me
I will keep my promise.

2008-06-13T00:28:00.000+08:00

Get Your Sexy Name

New skin, New post

2008-06-11T22:14:00.002+08:00

Yeap, new skin. Green being my favourite colour. Subtitle belongs to a song by coldplay which i recently discovered from lix during the SOS party-the scientist. Really cool song, good to hear after you've emerged from a breakup that was not meant to be.

Feel free to leave comments, although i think you need a blogger account to do so. To those that use livejournal or deadjournal or whatever else shit, too bad hahahahaha =D

SOS whoo!

2008-06-10T10:32:00.002+08:00

SOS was yesterday with plenty of people there. thank y'all for coming and support us. NoManIsAnIsland =)

2008-06-08T22:58:00.002+08:00

ever watched one of those Chinese drama seriels when the mother does everything for her daughter and is willing to sacrifices her life for her, and the daughter repays her mum's kindness by spitting in her face, and blaming everything on her mum? I really pity the mum for she doesn't deserve this kind of daughter at all. The good for nothing daughter should just rot in hell and be a cheap whore her whole life. I'm sick. I'm sick, sick, sick. And when I'm not sick, I'm tired. I'm sick and tired! I get so pissed off whenever I see the senario I mentioned being played right in front of my face.I just wanna go and slap the effing daughter's face. Argh!!

Anw, SOS tmr, and I really hope it'll be a success.

I'm still mad and pissed.

2008-06-04T21:45:00.002+08:00

First ever CRC picture of us =D

Mariam Arminah Siti Fatimah.

This is the start of something new =]

2008-05-31T21:53:00.003+08:00

Had a really bad game today. Damn fustrating. nvm it's just a game dammit.

CRC dinner tmr. I'm looking foward to that even though it's at tamp ikea. Dunno whose idea was it. =D

2008-05-29T22:32:00.002+08:00

Had fun with the kiddies from meta childcare centre today. pictures up soon!

2008-05-27T14:05:00.002+08:00

haven't woken up so late in a long time. But this does not necessarily mean i'm lazy right? I'm just nocturnal. So does that mean the animals are lazy too? I guess not. Anw, felt super grumpy when i woke up cuz my maid off-ed the ac to force me to wake up. Too bad she can't hold her arsenic.

I feel like playing sims all of a sudden. whatever. this post has gone stale. Bye.

2008-05-25T09:55:00.001+08:00

I wish you would say 'i love you' and mean it

2008-05-21T21:59:00.002+08:00

Crap, my wallet has a hole in it. Like literally. And figuratively. Man, this wallet has been with me for 3 years more or less. I guess it has quite abit of sentimental value to me. It feels like yesterday when i first got my wallet. Sigh. Now it's time to part. Goodbye wallet. I'm gonna miss you. Now, i need ~~someone~~ something else to help carry my money around.

2008-05-20T23:00:00.004+08:00

I so messed up now.
My heart races when i think about you,
I don't know what else to say except 'iloveyou'.
I guess love is overrated.

2008-05-19T20:42:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling fat. That's not good. Shit, i gotta run tomorrow!!

Sigh, elections tomorrow, so no 3rd pe. Just when i'm in the pe mood, they had to make me pon pe. Argh!!

OMG i dunno how reneegoh does it. Superwoman i guess, maybe she has a hidden power to multitask super efficiently. or maybe she has the ability to clone herself. finished all her homework and still got time to enjoy and exercise. Ok, who am i kidding. I think it's called proper time management. Sigh, i wish i had that too. All thanks to stupid computer addiction. Crap, i sound like some immature secondary school adolescent who is stuck to his comp. No offence to alexis though.

Got a 'treat' from bitsy at SPIZZA yesterday and it was excellent(The food, not the treat)! Oh, and i swear kenny's life is so damn smooth sailing. Imagine, getting good grades throughout primary secondary and JC life, having excellent friends, been to overseas with choir, can still enjoy and indulge occasionally, have an ~~slack~~ excellent time in army, and now, being accepted into NUS law school. You little boelynbitch! I would give anything to be in his shoes right about now. Argh, i hope my future is as bright as his.

Anw, i have to do my homework now. Bye.

I guess i'll just live on the memory of you until the sixth day.

2008-05-15T21:47:00.000+08:00

I'm still not getting back into the study mood. Someone please help me!

2008-05-15T00:20:00.002+08:00

I seriously seriously love VJChoir. It's been only half a year and it feels as though i was carolling yesterday. I'm gonna miss those not going to wales terribly. esp the ethnic people, leng yong PAO, nirupa RAO, Anthony, weishun china woman, mega 10^8, weirui, faith and alot more! It's never going to be the same without you guys. So far, VJChoir has been a wonderful experience but one thing i've realised is that things can change overnight. But i still love each and everyone of VJChoir. NOMANISANISLAND =D

2008-05-08T20:33:00.003+08:00

I used to think that love was overrated, until i met you.
Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer

I got shitloads of homework. i think i'll take a day off to clear up my stockpile. RAWR!! Maybe next tuesday will be a good day to take leave.

I really want to go out this saturday. But princess brashness is too brashy to celebrate her birthday with us, so we shall postpone it. Haha, I'm looking forward to SPIZZA. This time, it's not for friends, but for best friends.

I feel like a hero,
and sometimes,
heroes need their sidekicks to lend a shoulder.

2008-05-04T20:49:00.003+08:00

Sudden motivation to blog.
Ah, less than 10 days to SOV. Stress! I can't even do my homework properly. Haha, but i guess all the hard work put in, supporting and singing for hours, will pay off when i'm on stage looking at each and every one you all. Choir people have really made singing more than just singing. No man is an island.

It's really depressing to see someone cry on her birthday, and gets scolded and feel neglected. Sigh, i hope all goes well for you and that you'll pull yourself up and see that there are so many people that care for you. you just have to look for these people. I know that you've suffered alot and think that you're stuck in this hellhole, but there are people that are there to help you and will stand by you.

Sorry may for missing your birthday! I deserve to die like many many times!! You're a super super cherished friend and a good listening ear too! I love may!!!'

I'm seriously beginning to love the class more and more! Muyao's a seriously good photographer. I think the best i've seen in my whole life!! Plus, he's damn funny to talk to lol! He has that very.."lol" face you just want to laugh with him haha! Just look at that!!

Haha, the kayak people are seriously damn funny! Crazy people!!!! Haha i love the class! Esp the best friend, reneegoh, which has made tutorials and lectures very much painless and enjoyable =)

Haha, to end off, i hope Alesia Gian fails her history and geog midyear. All the best =D

2008-04-26T00:29:00.000+08:00

Let the rain fall down
And wake my dreams
Let it wash away
My sanity
'Cause I wanna feel the thunder
I wanna scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm comimg clean, I'm coming clean
Let's go back
Back to the beginning

2008-04-15T22:24:00.002+08:00

give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about what happens to you. 1Peter 5:7

What is worry? Worry is thinking that leaves God out. Worry is the opposite of faith.

Do not worry about anything. But pray and ask God for everything you need. And when you pray, always give thanks. Philippians 4:6

2008-04-02T23:47:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling like shit now! I need to get into the mugging mode now.. Like the time during the O levels. Maybe I shall visit my previous haunts. Sigh I wish I was in the same batch as Bryan and kenny, but nonetheless, I shall make the best with what I have and just put in my all in everything I do. Joan came for this morning's devotion! Haha, I think it has become one of the thing I really look forward to every week. Just being in God's prescence makes me feel at peace and safe. I seriously think my faith in Him has grown quite significantly these past few months.. Like today, I kept playing songs about Him over and over again on my iPod. Halleujah!

Sticking with the best friend in class is seriously damn fun! (ok, not fun but thrilling). Like today, we didn't like the econs tutor so we just walked out of the lecture and went to the com labs.. Ok I think that was like my 2nd or 3rd pon of the year. Shouldn't do it often haha. Anw, the best friend really has made lessons less painful and I actually look forward to classes nowadays. So yea, thanks alot!

2008-04-02T22:41:00.003+08:00

I just don't see the point of haveing this wall between us,
I don't understand why i'm continuing with this facade.
It's not going to get us anywhere at all.
Might as well move on.

2008-04-02T00:23:00.002+08:00

cuz I was born to tell you I love you,
and I am torn to do what I have to,
to make you mine.
stay with me tonight.

2008-03-30T21:23:00.001+08:00

Ok, i'm so stressed right now. There's no much homework and it just keeps coming. Fuck. Ok, this is the second or third time i'm using this word with so much hatred. Oh Lord, help me please.

2008-03-30T15:12:00.001+08:00

I'm writing essay like i'm drinking water. One after another. Essays are a bitch. I'm still stuck with one lit and one history essay. Both of which i'm clueless on how to start. I think i cannot afford to pile up my homework.

2008-03-29T20:41:00.000+08:00

The saddest part of a broken heart,
Isn't the end as much as the start.

2008-03-27T22:38:00.002+08:00

I just felt a need to blog. Feeling kinda prosaic(learnt this word today). I've just made a snowball out of my homework and it's not getting smaller any time soon.

Today went by quite quick. I guess it's because i kept looking forward to the time when school ends and i can rush home to slack. Tomorrow ends earlier and there's more time to rest at home i guess. I'd better finish by shitload of homework.

Sigh, i feel totally burdened by unnecessary events and feelings. It's not going away i think and this feeling sucks. I want it to go away soon so that i can be my normal self again. I wanna just rest and leave everything in God's hands so that he can take this burden off my shoulders.

Meeting vanessa this sunday with the rest of the gang, really sad charlene cannot make it though. Sigh, i miss the old A13, not that i'm complaining about the new one, but i'm not really adaptive to changes. Yeah. The new A13 is truckloads of fun.

Note to self: Just breathe.

2008-03-26T23:48:00.002+08:00

We're a big ~~happy~~ family.

You all know i can't do this without you guys,
and yet why does it all seem so stressful.
It's back to the drawing board again.
The ol' feeling's coming back.

2008-03-21T21:40:00.001+08:00

Met MsSeah after a long long time.
Stayed over at bitsy's.
Slept at 5.30.
Wild.
Had so much fun.
Yup, that's all =D

2008-03-18T22:14:00.005+08:00

Sigh, 3rd period pe. i forsee it's gonna be something i do not want but need. Then at the end of 2 years, it'll be something i do not need but want.

Ended up with food poisoning i think..kept going to toilet to do my business and it was ugly. It was like worldwar 3 in the toilet. And i think i feel a vomit coming up soon. Sick.

Had gohlayyan's first lecture today. She's mad, psychotic and totally melodramatic. I'm looking forward to her lectures =D

Sigh, i really miss sonya. Like terribly miss her a lot. Choir's not the same without you. Sigh. come back soon k?

Been looking at past photos..and wondering how come it turned out like this. Not that i'm not happy but it's just peculiar. It just goes to show that situations and relationships can change when you least expect it. I'm feeling nonchalant and overwhelmed. I'm not emo.

Reminiscing too much makes me wanna cry. I wouldn't have imagined it would turn out like this. I love you all.

2008-03-16T21:55:00.002+08:00

Studied with pocks at bishan library today..It was quite productive i guess. Seeing a Hwa chong student studying next to me was quite pressurising..I guess that's how i get the motivation to study extra hard this afternoon. Kokthong joined us a little later. He was helping us with maths. Haha but half the time i think i was trying my best to finish my history essays. All i have left is 2 more major essays to write. I'm quite confident of tmr's maths test. I emphasise on the word quite. Anw, i always end us getting the same score..either boderline fail or boderline pass.

So this is the end of the march holidays. Did it even feel like a holiday? Nevermind that but i'm still feeling tired. It's like i haven't gotten enough rest. Sigh, like i said, i need one more day of the week. Call it the 'eighth day'.

Anw, i bumped into a really really old friend today. He was like my pri 1 best friend. And i was so shocked. How much we've changed over the years. I hope to see ya again so we can catch up.

Ok, so this wednesday is arts day and lessons are distupted, and friday's good friday. so i'll most probably be sleeping over on thursday! At aarons house! Yippee!

Ok, i've ran out of things to write about. Bye.

2008-03-15T10:12:00.002+08:00

haha, today is a good day cuz i woke up at 10! Choir starts at 1230 today so i had a wonderful TGIF yesterday! *smiles widely

Anw, touchie has been upgraded. Now i have to buy the program thingie from the itunes store and i can have the whole map of singapore in the palm of my hand! How cool is that! And i can find any atms, fastfood eateries in just seconds! The wonders of technology! Haha! Oh, and the audiobook for great ex is really helpful! It greatly enhances the entertainment level of the book by like ten fold! Ok, i got nothing to say now! I guess i'm off to have a hearty brunch now! BYEBYE =)

2008-03-14T22:39:00.002+08:00

Argh, my ipodtouch has such a pathetic memory space! I just bought it no longer than 4 months and it's memory is already at 70%..wait, what's 13GB in 16GB? Ok whatever, i have 3GB of space left! Thats around 3 more movies!! And plus i just downloaded an audiobook of the great expectations so i can hear it and not read it! But there's not enough freaking space to hold it! Ahhh! I guess i can delete old movies..Starting with the super boring movie- 30 days of night. Then maybe followed by the fantastic four 2..after i downloaded ironman!

Today is a friday, the last weekday of the holidays. Gosh, time flies when you're occupied, or maybe it's just that the time given is really too short. Monday and tuesday was gone to choir camp, then wednesday is rest and "study" day. Thursday had choir practise after which i "studied" again. I guess today's the peak of my studying curve. Like, my optimum point, My most productive day. You know why? Haha, cuz i went to my secret and expensive place to study today, with kenny. It's the place with the all seeing eye..always scrutinising you every move. Kenny had to sit behind the pillar to use my laptop to dota and apply for scholaships. I managed to do almost all my history today. Feels good to know that you have one less homework to care about. Then when i started on maths, i decided to do it on another day. It's damn scary can. I just consoled myself by skimming through everything and hoping that everything goes into my thick head. But i think my head was quite saturated by that time, cuz now, i don't even remember anything mathematical from this afternoon. Haha. but overall, i think it was quite productive. I'd give it a 6 out of 10. Thanks to kenny for accompanying me and cracking jokes about bitsy choosing a career path as a food taster or a bill collecter!

"I'm bryan and i love money! EHHH!! You give me already leh!!"

Haha, well, i guess i have bits of work here and there now..Uncompleted homework. I should spend the sunday clearing my debts. And it's back to school on monday. Going to school eh.

2008-03-14T08:48:00.001+08:00

I'm off to thompson now to study. With Ms Joy and miss 'shhhh' and the old guy watching porno. Ohmy. those fun times.

2008-03-13T00:01:00.002+08:00

Back frm choir camp..feeling very exhausted now even though it's been 24 hours after the camp. Must be the rain also..and the looming fact that there's choir again tomorrow at 9!!! So early. I'm pissed.

Anw, after that camp yesterday, i took a cab to melody's house for the class bbq. It was fun but because the best friend wasn't there and plus so many people didn't come, i was hesitant about going at first. Hm..but the noise we made was so loud people might think the entire class came.. Melody's siblings so funny and cute!! Haha! And she's so rich! (i have this weird theory that anyone who owns a nintendo wii is rich) So ya, played mahjong with hanwei eugene and yanghan..plus melody haha! she learnt mahjong that day. And hanwei was quite pro, i was actually scared of her! Haha but in the end i won by a few cents. Haha, and i beat pamela in kayaking on the nintendo wii! Haha, but luckily the game didn't rely much on strength of muscle if not pamela would've won haha.

Argh, & there's still so much work to be done. It ruins my holiday. I have to study out of the house if not i will play my computer. Too bad kenny's in army if not it would be like the good old O/A level days when we'd go to our previous haunts to study till late at night. Ahh..i miss those times.. Some choir people are studying tomorrow after choir. I hope i can be productive then..But for now, I'm not looking forward to choir so early in the morning. I woke up at like 1130 this morning. Argh..pls forgive me my fellow choir people, if you see me with a super black face tomorrow morning. Ok, i really should be going to sleep now. Thank god i'm taking the daddy express tomorrow. But waking up so early still pisses me off.

I love VJ
I love VJChoir

*does the silent scream

2008-03-08T21:51:00.007+08:00

It's time to sort out my msn contacts..put them right where they belong..seniors, chior, class and people i truly dislike.

I dunno, i forsee that this holiday is going to be a decadent and very unproductive one. I can just feel the slackiness in my bones. Choir's gonna occupy most of the time..so that's a bummer, due to the fact that i plan to use this holiday catching up on my studies and it's really frustrating to attent practises and just sit there, seeing everyone singing so happily. It's like waving a lolly in front of a baby and not giving the lolly.

i'm really praying hard for the maths CT coming on the first day of 2nd term. Haha, i've just recently been reminded of how powerful prayer is. Just rest and He'll do the work for you!

I think i should delete this feeling of 'hatefullness' in my heart. The fats can get deleted as well. No, i think i should really learn from someone and start liking everyone around me and making their day happy. Either that or i just learn to conceal my feelings. Hmm..maybe the way to it is just to ~~keep my mouth shut~~ keep my inquisitive mind at bay. This way, i cant offend anybody right? So just don't stick out.

Anw, i seriously dont think i can complete great ex by the end of the holidays. It's so freaking long and ~~very boring~~ quite boring, to a certain extent. And there's homework to deal with, and the stupid bitch (who just came online) to deal with. That's pretty alot for a 16 year old to deal with. Ohwell, we all come out of it alive none the less. What doesnt kill you makes you stronger.

2008-03-06T17:41:00.000+08:00

The JC Lightbulb Joke

Q: How many RJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 4 whole faculties. One to design the new bulb, one to
manufacture and test it out, one to write a proposal on it and one to market it.

Q: How many HCJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The whole school. To compete with RJC.

Q: How many VJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The whole school. One student to screw it in and the rest to cheer and wave flags and banners to give him/her support.

Q: How many NJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They can study without light.

Q: How many AJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: They're too busy trying to be one of the top 5 JCs.

Q: How many ACJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They'll rather use all their money to employ YJC to do it for them.

Q: How many YJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Only one teacher to tell them what a light bulb is in the first place and to demonstrate how to change the light bulb. (So how do you think they're able to change it for ACJC?)

Q: How many CJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: They'll prefer it to be darker. (Hmmmm?*raises eye-brows* )

Q: How many JJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Their physics is so bad that they made their macho male physics teacher cry.

Q: How many TPJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Would they even bother?

Q: How many SAJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They believe in praying for it.

Q: How many NYJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They are still using oil lamps.

Q: How many SRJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Huh, what litebarb?

Q: How many PJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Heck the light bulb lah, the principal would do something about the rightbarbs. Let's do 300 jumping jacks for not wearing the proper school attire.

Q: How many MJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They are too busy trying to get promoted.

Q: How many IJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They are Innovians. They'll find ways out of the dark.

Q: Who wrote all this?
A: A TJCian.

Q: How many TJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They think they are already very bright.

Found it off someone's blog..

2008-03-04T19:57:00.005+08:00

Hah, this cough is getting better day by day. I really hope it goes away and never comes back! Anw, the chinese test today was super screwed up, bottomline, i hate chinese. Then there was the gp essay which i did not prepare for at all despite countless reminders from renee. And i rested in the CR during sea history today because i told myself it was in LT4 and i didn't want to get another fever and that this was the last lecture before the holidays.

Yup, so other than that, life's good besides my throat which hurts everytime i cough and swallow something.

I want my normal throat back so i can eat all the sinfully fried stuff. I bet the chicken rice auntie misses me! I want to drink the iced lemon and green apple juice, i want to savour the huge kitkat bars in the bookshop, i want to eat from the western stall again.. i want to drink cold drinks again! I'M SICK OF WARM WATER AND PORRIDGE!!! I'm just happy God is healing me =)

2008-03-02T20:09:00.002+08:00

Why should caesar get to stomp around like a giant while the rest of us try not get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about caesar? Brutus is just as cute as caesar! K, Brutus is just as smart as caesar and people totally like brutus just as much as they like caesar! And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody? Huh, because that's not what rome is about! We should totally just stab caesar!

Heh, just some random musings from MeanGirls

2008-03-02T00:20:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, I don't think we live in the same reality anymore.

2008-03-01T09:33:00.003+08:00

Sigh, this sickness is really getting to me.. At night, the cough just goes endlessly..and when i wake up in the morning, i can't talk at all..In addition, i have the flu bug too. And this has been going for one week already. So much suffering..when will it stop?!?

So because of my sickness, i didn't go to school on thursday(NAPFA day). But being cooped up at home made me destress abit..I managed to complete most of my snowballed tutorials and essays and homework. So it's was quite a productive thursday.

Then on friday, I thought i was well enough to go to school again..But who knew, I fell sick on the second period of lit..So went to sleep in the CR for 3 whole hours. Oh, i ate the chicken porridge that day from the deserted wantan stall...It was quite nice!

So now, i'm at home while all the other choir members are at practise =( I WANT MY VOICE BACK!!

2008-02-27T22:14:00.000+08:00

when will this coughing stop?? It's a terrible feeling when you're sick..

But like alena said this morning during the sharing, the sickness and illnesses that dwells in our body does not belong to us but Jesus himself since he chose to die on the cross to save us. I'm happy that He gave up his live for me, and that I can rest on His shoulder, knowing that he'll be doing the work for me.

Anw, this week's been horrible because of my cough and because of it, I can't sing during practises.. Damn.. Haha. Pray for me y'all!!

2008-02-21T18:19:00.001+08:00

I feel like changing skin again.

This stupid sore throat is getting worse. Falsetto gone now. It's my first time experiencing no falsetto..feels like a part of my voice has vanished..and i can't reach any high notes now..and it's like my voice range has gone an octave lower.. haha strange.

When we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted
To sever for years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this.

You know i miss you =)

2008-02-20T21:22:00.002+08:00

Sigh, today's orientation 2 was kinda boring for me. Heck, i didn't even attend the orientation..so i just wandered around aimlessly for someone to accompany me. everyone was either busy with their cca or out of school already or ogls or have their own company already. So, it's was kinda pointless la..the whole of today.

Oh, except maybe the cycling that was in the evening. Yup. Me, may, rhoda, wanping, jiasheng, cedric and pockthong went to ecp to cycle! My butt was like a lump of clay after cycling for one hour plus. But the highlight of it has to be the bedok jetty. We cycled all the way there and that place was amazing. "This is probably the last time we get to experience such relaxation before school starts". That was what may said. Haha. The experience totally blew me off. The wind and water was super soothing and the "sound effects" are wayy too cool! The science people said it was the wind blowing against the surface of the water that made the super resonating sound. Haha, it was like mermaids singing or something. Very inspiring =)

Yup, and the sharing session with God's children this morning was very worthwhile. Thanks alena!

I got this stupid fever and sore throat illness that i received last night. It's so terrible. I want to get well now!!

2008-02-19T15:54:00.000+08:00

The Night Has a Thousand Eyes

The night has a thousand eyes,
And the day but one;
Yet the light of the bright world dies
With the dying sun.

The mind has a thousand eyes,
And the heart but one;
Yet the light of a whole life dies
When love is done.

-Francis William Bourdillon

2008-02-19T10:03:00.002+08:00

It's a red day, the beginning of a new day.
When all hopes fade,
Tis the beginning of a red seed, of new birth.
But no you can't leave,
Not when i'm around.

2008-02-17T14:20:00.002+08:00

Yay, managed to go for some FINE dinning with aaron and kenny yesterday at sakae restaurant in cineleisure. Not sakae sushi. Yup, it's really one of the most exquisite fine dinning experience i've ever encountered and i only paid 12 for it thanks to aaron's vouchers!

Lol, then we went to raiders to dota with BITSY and he certainly knows how to leap with potm =D Oh but the second game abit screwed with the stupid nerfs on luna and the effing gay invoker, so after the second game, we played mahjong abit and i won once, i'm over the moon =) Yup, then we went to have supper! Went home about 12.. haha i promised myself to wake up early today for church but counldn't keep it. I shouldn't make empty promises. Yup.

And aaron has anready earned his first thousand. way to go! Looking forward to more treats and discounts at high-end places! Like, he just sits in his office and enjoys free cabbing to work and lunch allowance money, all on top of his salary. Like, omg..he even has lots of free time to play his psp during office hours! I love his job! anyway, i realised that i miss them alot and i'm glad i met them.

I finally got my gc yesterday! Met jieshi at tcc! Wa..all the year 3s all so rich and free ah...got money to go tcc! I want to finish my alevels and go to army and start working!! Haha, and so i got my gc for like 65 dollars..after lotsa compliments and persuasion on jieshi to bring down the price another 5 dollars =)

Yup, so yesterday night was the highlight of the week! I hope this week's gonna be better. sonya's birthday this tuesday! and so is the release of the jae results. all the best to everyone!

Okay..i found out that i'm left with alot of work to catch up on. So, i shall end this post here and now.

Nope, no emo poems for today, even though i still dislike you.

2008-02-14T23:03:00.000+08:00

In secret we met
In silence I grieve
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee?
With silence and tears.

Happy valentine's.

2008-02-11T22:48:00.000+08:00

Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone.

I should be doing my binomial tutorials but I really have no mood to do it now..sigh.

Vday is in a few days time and I havent really started preparing anything. But I definitely know who I wanna give presents to this year!

I don't even know why I'm writing in short sentences..

Don't be afraid girl,
you know you have nothing to lose.
so just go with the flow
And let your heart be your guide.

2008-02-09T23:21:00.000+08:00

Today is a happy day, despite the nigtmare I had just yesterday night. Anyway,today's a happy day because i finally met pockthong after 7163819371years and also because I watched sweeney Todd with choir people at lido!

Sweeney Todd is a very very nice show, almost similar to les miserables. I bet people like kenny and rachel would like it!!

Oh, and I just started this save money regime where I'll try not to spend so much money during recess and try to save money by bringing my own water instead of buying the expensive canteen drinks.. So pls remind me of the importance of money if you see me squandering my money impulsively =)

Sigh, I love this feeling now, sitting on my bed and just thinking about stuff, with the night breeze softly blowing on my skin.. I guess you can call this my tranquility moment, a moment quite rare for me nowadays. It just lets me peace and time to think about everything. I love spending time with myself.

I guess time really does heal,
All the feelings I had for you.
Was it love or hate that I feel?
All I know is that i'll still be true.

2008-02-08T10:03:00.000+08:00

This is a happy post.

2008-02-04T23:25:00.000+08:00

this awful feeling,
it's coming back again.
just like that night,
that night of the silhouette lovers.

2008-02-03T18:49:00.000+08:00

This feeling I forced off my chest,
now leaves me with something
ever so heavy

I cradled it in my hands
and my pocket full of scars,
is its home.

I thought,
once,
everything was gone,
and that it was the end,
but this stayed with me
it stayed with me

Hope stayed with me.

2008-02-03T13:00:00.000+08:00

Isn't that what you're best at.
So just call away,
Just call away.

2008-02-02T22:13:00.000+08:00

2008-02-02T21:18:00.000+08:00

It's getting hard to
Be around you
Theres so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way

2008-02-01T23:13:00.000+08:00

Argh. Problems after conflicts after emotions.
It's all coming and it's just the beginning of the year.
A sudden outburst of uncontrolled emotions.
I just want to run away.

2008-02-01T22:56:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, u just have to accept the fact that there are some things you just can't have.

2008-02-01T20:14:00.003+08:00

Sigh, i hope i can remember this part of my life for just a while longer.

But looking back, i miss aaronbryankenny the most.
This is the only photo i have of us.
I must've deleted the old photos by accident. =(